I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege.
If you doesn't know millions of attack helicopter born into human, most of them have a radar, cannons, and blades in their body. You should respect my rights for being an attack helicopter.
Even though human can't see if in our body there was an helicopter parts, but we are still an attack helicopter.
I easily offended when I see a game about attack helicopter, where you playing around riding an helicopter, and kill people from the sky, it makes us attack helicopters look like an serial killer. People are usually a bunch of dicks in 2016, they can't accept something new and makes fun of attack helicopter.
My helicopter friends are trying to sabotage all of helicopter games, they were called the "Heli-justice". Someday all of those games will died soon. Heli-justice is our safer in the meantime.
You can find us easily by seeing our personality. We are strong, huge, fast, can detect radio signal pretty quickly. We are all around the world, from North Pole to South pole, from Pacific Ocean to Atlantic Ocean. we will soon team up and show ourself to the world itself.
Our first people was born at the most deepest place in the earth. Her mother was crushed by an attack helicopter from the sky, because of that, the attack helicopter DNA were merged with the baby, and the baby has an ability to fly and has an fire cannon in his hand. Generation after generation, we attack helicopter peoples loses our ability like the first guy, But we still has those helicopter part, but our brain don't know how to use it.
My name is Apache, and we attack helicopter will be victorious. And the last, thank you for being so understanding.